"Don't wish me happiness I don't expect to be happy all the time....It's gotten beyond that somehow. Wish me courage and strength and a sense of humor. I will need them all." Anne Morrow Lindbergh

Tuesday, 3 January 2012

birthing fear

Today I cried. Was it over the birth classes I decided not to attend because I felt it would underline my aloneness or the lamaze breathing classes that don't exist? Or was it that I couldn't find online the help I wanted? I am on the precipice of realizing that birthing is more than a physical event. It is a passage into a different part of the circle of life both spiritually and emotionally and I need to  prepare that part of myself. I also need to rid myself of the fear our culture installs into us of birthing and pain. I want a natural childbirth and I have no reason to doubt that my body will know what to do and that my faith in myself will carry me through. After all if I could tear the roof off my place, put on a second floor and a new roof while pregnant and alone surely I can have the birth I want.

Willow Tree

I am a willow tree,
Strong, yet fluid

I can bend with the wind,
but my roots are tough,

Opening to birth my child,
is flowing with the wind:

from a soft and gentle breeze
to a stormy gale
back to a soft and gentle breeze.

My body is strong, but flexible.
It is my friend, it knows how to open.
I am a friend to my body

eating well, walking, and loving myself.

I shall birth safely, freely, openly....

among my loved and trusted ones.

I am the willow flexible,

beautiful resilient
endowed with the power of surrender

to the wind rustling through my leaves,
my branches.

My roots reach deep into Mother Earth
anchored in Her strength
I bring forth life
in joy!

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