"Don't wish me happiness I don't expect to be happy all the time....It's gotten beyond that somehow. Wish me courage and strength and a sense of humor. I will need them all." Anne Morrow Lindbergh

Sunday, 24 November 2013

Ripple Afghan

This afghan is a gift. Knitting it took forever but it went perfectly. I never broke or lost a needle. I never ran out of yarn. Never spilled my tea on it or missed a row in a pattern repeat. Nothing went wrong. And even the day I completed it and took it outside the cabin to photograph the lighting was perfect.

Friday, 15 November 2013

The night

The elderberry leaves fell today. The lime yellow leaves tinged with green covered the gravel path from the gate to the covered porch. Life like leaves last only a season. An island friend passed away.....As I write this Babygirl is sleeping and I am sitting at my desk with my battery led Lamp. A beeswax candle burns brightly nearby on a shelf. I don't mind not having electricity. It encourages me to rest and contemplate. On the coast winter nights are dark as the sky is obscured by clouds. Last night it cleared off and the moon shone through the curtainless windows. It woke me up and then I drifted back to sleep content to imagine the great beauty of the forest beyond the window.

Sent from my iPhone

Tuesday, 5 November 2013

The silence

is beautiful. I sit at the kitchen table looking out at the bare armed maple tree. Rust coloured leaves adorn young evergreens and sword ferns. As I write this it's plus five and raining lightly. I don't feel inclined to be outside anymore. After insulating the loft and even with the stove burning interminately during the day it is enough to keep Babygirls hands warm. Still it's nice to go outside just a little. The other day I went out walking with an island friend I hadn't seen since spring. When we were first reunited in the whirlwind of joy Babygirl dropped her sippycup and by the time I noticed and retraced our steps it had been blasted into a million pieces under a tire. Probably by another friend who had gone to rescue my friend whose truck had run out of gas on her way home when the fuel gauge quit working. As for the sippycup when you are 42.00 dollars from town and half a days worth of time you try not to be careless and make errors like this. Babygirl is drinking from a cup albeit messily but life is messy. Why do we expect life to be perfect? Is this a reflection of the selfishness of the human heart? Is it sometimes necessary to change our expectations? Is the spiderweb so beautiful because we know how ugly the spider is?

Sunday, 3 November 2013

Ending middle of the night nursing

I've decided to continue the weaning and eliminate night time feedings. For the last week or so I let Babygirl nurse for four minutes and now we are on three minutes. She is taking it very well. By the end of the first week she was unlatching herself around the four minute mark. However, it's been disruptive to my sleep and I am frequently overtired. Did I mention I am frequently overtired? I'm glad it's easy for her and more importantly it means she's ready.